Lucid Dream #4 — Nightmares of False Awakenings

December 14, 2022

‘I must have had about 6 or 7 false awakenings by now, and I was getting very anxious and desperate.’

This morning I was delighted with another lucid dream! And even though the experience was not so pleasant anymore towards the end, I still am very grateful for the experience as it showed me once again that hard work pays off. I have been into lucid dreaming for a while now, but with my current ongoing ‘world’ travels, it is often quite hard to get any routine into my days and nights. I am being stimulated every day by new things, such as new sights, sounds and smells. My dreams vary more, and my dreamsigns are less reliant. That makes it even more difficult for a beginner oneironaut to get consistent lucid dreams.

But whenever I really put in some effort – that means meditating every day, keeping up with my dream journal and performing effective reality checks, plus a dose of strong intention – it pays off every time. And last night, I was yet again thrilled to find myself conscious in the dream. It was a wake-induced lucid dream (WILD) for the first time, and it felt incredible! So let me tell you about it.

I went to sleep with a strong intention in mind. I was counting myself to sleep, repeating mantra’s in my mind at the same time. Breathe in – one – breathe out – two – I will lucid dream tonight – breathe in – three – etc. I was priming my subconscious mind. And it worked! The next thing I remember, I was slightly awake and felt myself slipping into the dream world. But it wasn’t right after going to sleep. It was actually about 8 hours later, going into my last REM period. My body was transitioning into the last sleep cycle, but my mind was slightly more awake. I stared into the darkness behind my eyelids and saw some hypnagogic images. I tried to focus on one, and it pulled me right into the dream scene.

I was lying in a bed in a bright room that looked like a hospital room. I was awakening from sleep and felt my mind moving from my body in bed to standing next to the bed. I was looking at my own body! And I knew that I was dreaming. I felt so happy. A man was standing next to the bed, looking at some data on a computer screen. It was Andy, the co-founder of the app Headspace. He must have been researching me while sleeping. But now I was awake and lucid, so the research was complete. I told him I had just had a WILD experience, and he seemed pleased. I felt like my job was done there, and I could now explore the dream. So on I went through a glass door into a purple-coloured underground laboratory. I remember walking around and specifically feeling things with my hands, such as a sofa, the door and other things in my way. This definitely stabilized the dream, but to be sure, I decided to do a reality check as well. Curious to see what would happen. I looked at my hands, and one of my fingers looked like a worm moving up and down. Strange! Next, I tried to jump up and fly, but for whatever reason, I couldn’t. I did another reality check and looked at my hands again. My vision zoomed in on the pores of my hand, and they started to look like piano keys. Even more strange! I walked on.

I found myself in a room with big windows and a tall ceiling where some people sat at a long table. I decided to join them. They were also research participants. They were studying and writing things about lucid dreaming. I sat down next to a girl and told her about my experience. But instead of just telling her, I decided to show her. I must have nodded off right there at the table because next, I found myself in another dream.

This is where it started to get a bit strange. I found myself waking up in a random house. I walked around, and saw some people on a balcony, looking at the fields and mountains in the distance. I decided to do a reality check because I was now slightly less lucid. I looked at my hands again and counted 5.. 6.. 7 fingers. Yep, still dreaming. I decided to engage with a dream character. I asked one of the women on the balcony what her biggest fear was. I was hoping it would show me one of my own fears so that I could confront it. This is actually a lucid dreaming goal of mine for whenever I get slightly more experienced. But suddenly, I got scared. I didn’t want to hear (or experience) the answer, so. I walked to a door and told myself: “Behind this door, I will find Pandora (a fantasy world of ‘Avatar’ the movie).” But as I walked through the door, I woke up in the same house again, in a bed next to an unknown friend. “We have to go!” I said to her, and we ran into the next dream scene. Now even less lucid. I found myself in a pool/river that ended at a big mill, sucking up everyone in the pool. I knew the mill was dangerous, so I grabbed my friends’ arm and dove underwater to swim away from it. But the guards spotted us, and they started shooting at us with guns.

Once again, I woke up in bed in that same house. I walked outside onto the balcony, and the same people were there. But now, the sky was purple. Aha! Still dreaming. At this point, I felt like I just wanted to wake up. So I asked the same woman as before: “What do you usually do when you want to wake up from a dream?” She answered: “I hold my breath and count from 0 to 100, and I tell myself that I will wake up between 50 and 75". I walked towards a door and told myself that whenever I go through it, I would find myself at Hogwarts.

But instead, I found myself waking up in the same bed next to my friend again. I tried holding my breath and counting, but it felt like a few minutes had passed, and I wondered why my physical body hadn’t woken up yet. I tried to trigger my physical sleeping body by making it think I couldn’t breathe, but that’s when I realized I could breathe through my pinched nose in a dream, as that’s one of my reality checks during wakefulness as well. So it didn’t work. By now, I was maybe only 20% lucid, compared to the beginning of this dream, and it felt like almost an hour had passed. I really wanted to wake up now. I looked up and suddenly saw a dragon flying towards me through the purple sky. I dragged my friend along, and we ran outside towards a cliff. We jumped over some hatching dragon eggs, and I feared this mama dragon even more now. I found a big tree hanging from the edge of the cliff, and decided to hide behind it. “The dragon won’t find us here!” I shouted to my friend. But of course, it did… And I woke up again in the same bed. By this time, it felt as if the dream had become my reality. I must have had about 6 or 7 false awakenings by now, and I was getting very anxious and desperate. I tried to slap myself in the face, but it didn’t even hurt. In the end, I just started screaming WAKE UP! My voice sounded muffled, but the next thing I knew, I woke up. In my real bed. At last.

(And yes… I had to do at least 3 reality checks before I was convinced that I was actually awake.)

To be honest, writing this now, it actually sounds a bit terrifying. I didn’t really know what reality was at some point and I was very desperate to wake up. I was less lucid and didn’t realize I was in a dream anymore. Or worse, if I would even wake up. But during the dream, I still carried that joyful emotion of pride into every next dream scene. Satisfaction about the fact that I was lucid dreaming at all. And for some reason, this emotion felt stronger than all the other negative emotions I felt later in the dream. And that’s why I still see it as a very positive experience!

I hope you enjoyed reading my intermingled inception-like dream experience, and if you have any tips or experiences you would like to share, you are most welcome to comment below!